So I read the whole story...this Bi character sounds like every bad Silicon Valley yuppie stereotype rolled into one, with a big dose of legit mental illness. The lady sounded extremely manic. Don't know if it is just rage bait, but sure worked that way.
quickthrowman · 8m ago
It’s an interesting tale of what happens when you have enough wealth to insulate you from the insane decisions that a manic episode can generate. An ‘average’ person pursuing this sort of harassment campaign would end up institutionalized, at least temporarily. They would at least have someone tell them straight up that they need help, something this woman has probably never had to face (at least since being wealthy)
I feel bad for this woman, she’s trapped in a manic prison by having enough wealth to turn everyone into enablers. I’ve seen active mania and how it affects decision making and the perception of reality in the people suffering under it. I’d much prefer a lack of guardrails nudging me towards treatment instead of wealth enabling me to engage in a public campaign of harassment.
Sometimes a lack of consequences is more debilitating than facing the consequences of your actions, if facing those consequences can set you on a better path, something I’ve learned from personal experience with chemical addiction.
FireBeyond · 1h ago
Absolutely. It was escalating through the story, but this paragraph nailed it:
> She also hired psychics to give her answers. As she tells it, they all blamed Smith. One suggested that an ex-boyfriend of Smith’s had turned her against Baby Leon. Another claimed to see traumas on Smith’s belly and said she was clearly having rough sex. He warned: “She has something to hide.” When Smith refused to release her medical records unless nonpregnancy information was redacted, Bi saw it as confirmation that Smith was hiding crucial details.
What in living fuck do psychics have to do with a surrogacy process?
Also, this:
> SAI countered that there was “no documented bleed” on the date in question but clarified that there was “some light pink fluid which the doctor was not concerned about.” SAI said Smith asked the doctors to tell Bi directly, and that the contract gave Smith two weeks to tell Bi. “That’s emergency information,” Bi said. “She should have told me right away.”
You're going to have a hard time convincing a court that an obstetrician noted, and was unconcerned about something but that you believe it was "emergency information".
> If Bi had been told, she believed that Leon would be alive. She would’ve insisted on a C-section immediately.
A layperson insisting on a C-section at what would have been ... 27-28 weeks gestation? Where viability is ~70% at best? There's so much to poke at there. Ostensibly, Bi had a contract with the surrogacy agency that "guaranteed" a "well baby". One, who writes that contract? And seems to me the mere act of "insisting" on a C-section (which let's also be clear, has a risk to the mother, though lower) at that gestation would be at odds with any "guarantees".
No comments yet
KittenInABox · 1h ago
As someone who is not in the world of surrogacy: how much control does someone typically have over a surrogate during the pregnancy? Also what are you supposed to do in the event a surrogate has irreparable harm like losing a uterus or death?
bigbadfeline · 4m ago
> how much control does someone typically have over a surrogate during the pregnancy?
The original article makes it clear:
The product is fully controlled all the way to "The Island" [1]
And that is achieved not by direct legislation but by the lack of it. That lack is filled by contract law and an expensive, convoluted legal system which puts the surrogates in a precariously vulnerable position.
>> tuckerman: Very little [control], ultimately the healthcare the surrogate is receiving is _her_ healthcare.
That means, if something goes wrong the surrogates are stuck with med bills too, in addition to the legal ones.
[1] "The Island" 2005, recommended viewing, the movie might be available on big tube.
tuckerman · 1h ago
> how much control does someone typically have over a surrogate during the pregnancy
Very little, ultimately the healthcare the surrogate is receiving is _her_ healthcare.
> what are you supposed to do in the event a surrogate has irreparable harm
These things are spelled out in the contract that the IPs have with their surrogate. Both things you mention are specifically called in our contract and the agency/IPs usually have insurance to cover these cases.
I feel bad for this woman, she’s trapped in a manic prison by having enough wealth to turn everyone into enablers. I’ve seen active mania and how it affects decision making and the perception of reality in the people suffering under it. I’d much prefer a lack of guardrails nudging me towards treatment instead of wealth enabling me to engage in a public campaign of harassment.
Sometimes a lack of consequences is more debilitating than facing the consequences of your actions, if facing those consequences can set you on a better path, something I’ve learned from personal experience with chemical addiction.
> She also hired psychics to give her answers. As she tells it, they all blamed Smith. One suggested that an ex-boyfriend of Smith’s had turned her against Baby Leon. Another claimed to see traumas on Smith’s belly and said she was clearly having rough sex. He warned: “She has something to hide.” When Smith refused to release her medical records unless nonpregnancy information was redacted, Bi saw it as confirmation that Smith was hiding crucial details.
What in living fuck do psychics have to do with a surrogacy process?
Also, this:
> SAI countered that there was “no documented bleed” on the date in question but clarified that there was “some light pink fluid which the doctor was not concerned about.” SAI said Smith asked the doctors to tell Bi directly, and that the contract gave Smith two weeks to tell Bi. “That’s emergency information,” Bi said. “She should have told me right away.”
You're going to have a hard time convincing a court that an obstetrician noted, and was unconcerned about something but that you believe it was "emergency information".
> If Bi had been told, she believed that Leon would be alive. She would’ve insisted on a C-section immediately.
A layperson insisting on a C-section at what would have been ... 27-28 weeks gestation? Where viability is ~70% at best? There's so much to poke at there. Ostensibly, Bi had a contract with the surrogacy agency that "guaranteed" a "well baby". One, who writes that contract? And seems to me the mere act of "insisting" on a C-section (which let's also be clear, has a risk to the mother, though lower) at that gestation would be at odds with any "guarantees".
No comments yet
The original article makes it clear: The product is fully controlled all the way to "The Island" [1]
And that is achieved not by direct legislation but by the lack of it. That lack is filled by contract law and an expensive, convoluted legal system which puts the surrogates in a precariously vulnerable position.
>> tuckerman: Very little [control], ultimately the healthcare the surrogate is receiving is _her_ healthcare.
That means, if something goes wrong the surrogates are stuck with med bills too, in addition to the legal ones.
[1] "The Island" 2005, recommended viewing, the movie might be available on big tube.
Very little, ultimately the healthcare the surrogate is receiving is _her_ healthcare.
> what are you supposed to do in the event a surrogate has irreparable harm
These things are spelled out in the contract that the IPs have with their surrogate. Both things you mention are specifically called in our contract and the agency/IPs usually have insurance to cover these cases.
Source: I had my son through surrogacy