I Founded Girls Who Code. Now I'm Worried About Boys

First, there are some platitudes or outright stereotypes that are presented as profound insights, e.g. “men do not connect emotionally as well as women”. Whether this is or is not true is up for debate in the first place, but either way, it’s hardly a novel or interesting statement. Discussing the causal relationships that yield this emergent phenomena, and using that to synthesize a solution, is far more interesting.

Second, these issues primarily affect lower or middle class men and boys. There’s just something off-putting about an Ivy League-educated lawyer and politician, who is not a man, writing op eds about men’s issues and how to address them. Like… what exactly makes her think that she would have any valuable insight that’s not inherently obvious to the median American male? Cynically, I think it may be good for us to have women spearheading this, because it’s politically incorrect for men to raise these issues. That right there illustrates one of the central cultural illnesses that is resulting in the enshittification of men.

But most of all, I find it patronizing that this piece refuses to acknowledge that men have legitimate complaints in some respects. Eg during my undergrad, there was a TA room where students could go for help on CS projects. There was almost always a line down the hall because of the popularity of the major. However, female CS students had their own special TA room, with an equal number of TAs, despite women making up like 10% of the major. For another example, look at the female-exclusive career fairs and resulting employment opportunities, like at GHC. Men and boys see this stuff in front of their face all the time. They know it’s not fair. It’s obvious that it’s not fair. But nobody wants to say it, because you’ll be labeled as all sorts of horrible things. That is emblematic of the core, central issues in our modern gender roles and expectations as they relate to men. And I hate to say it, but IME, these harmful attitudes towards men are primarily perpetuated by women (in particular, the very-online crowd)

For me it took entering management in the military to really learn and appreciate empathy as a vital skill.

I really do tire of people with shit empathic abilities trying to Dunning-Kruger it with internalized sympathy. Sympathy does more harm than good at learning empathy. Call that tough love.

Interesting how the article starts. She had a good heart and wanted to help fix a problem, but didnt consider the unintended consequences.

>Boys and men are less likely to turn to their communities for social connection and support. Less likely to go to college. More likely to die by suicide or overdose. Too often, instead of being met with care, they’ve been manipulated and handed division. Not just by podcast bros, but by a government that’s actively stoking the divide for their own political gain.

You're describing an existing divide and the republicans are seeking to help the situation. Why the rapid twist toward government stoking the divide? This is a problem well beyond 1 country.

>And while we’ve been distracted, our boys have been searching for connection and finding it in the worst places. Small men with loud voices who hold court over internet echo chambers, like Andrew Tate, offer them simplistic answers for all of their complicated fears and insecurities. Man up. Toughen up. Win at all costs. And those answers are harming boys and men. We failed to offer them belonging, so they’re grappling for control.

She still doesnt get it. Male relationships are simpler; they thrive on directness, loyalty and honesty. But social media labels that as against the rules.

When social media like reddit went wrong. You get the following problem.

>The issue at hand won’t be solved with better messaging, another podcast, or a new influencer to follow. We are not going to out-algorithm the “manosphere.

You cant out algorithm because you're applying female relationship rules to men and that's never going to work. This attempt to make men follow female rules was hilariously misguided and doomed to fail epicly. You've completely lost any audience on this subject. This is a dead subject for men now.

>We need schools that teach emotional literacy alongside academics. We need public investment in youth mental health. We need a “Men Who Nurse” and a “Guys Who Teach,” pipeline programs that can offer boys real pathways forward in fields that desperately need them.

your idea failed in the marketplace of ideas and your goal is the push it in schools anyway? You dont see the unintended consequences of this?

Men represent like 10% of nursing and 20% of teachers; but i very much doubt those 2 movements ever get the boost your girls who code ever got.

>And we need to tell our boys that the loudest voices with the simplest answers are often the most dangerous. Instead, real power listens, real might is judicious, and real leadership invites doubt. Often, real bravery sounds like, “I don’t know, but let’s figure it out together.”

This is your go-to strategy. Attack the 'manosphere' as dangerous and untrustworthy based on what?

Lets go back to how this started in how she didnt "get it"

She still doesnt get it. That's why Trump is in power and doing some batshit crazy stuff in her country.