The Poison Within Patriotism

> During a group date, my date's friend wanted to go to a bar. He asked if I could get in without ID because he didn't think I was living here legally. One moment I felt like I belonged with them. The next, I was reminded that I'm not really part of the group. It made me sad to hear that question.

I'm not sure what type of self-hatred this is. Someone wants to go to a bar, unsure of the legal status of another, color plays a factor but we know nothing about their socioeconomic status or if this writer is in California, the friend of the date asks not as if he is looking for something to get the writer on but rather to make sure they won't have issues. This does not imply anything about his opinions of the writer, and seeing how he is ok with the writer's presence I doubt that this is an issue of "patriotism", it's a legal concern.

Patriotism in America is about uniting under the flag and it's values; it's not about if you are a certain color. There's a reason why we have American patriots of all races; you don't really see that too often in other places. If you don't have those values, then you aren't one of us, that's what patriotism is by definition in this country and our context.

No, this is insane. I will make a thousand people uncomfortable on group dates if that's what it takes to have an actual country.

Are people hurt? Are things unfair? Would it be kinder and more humane if we could see each others' souls, and trust prevailed? Absolutely.

But we can not. And there is an asymmetry to civilization---it is easier to destroy than to build. This makes division (other names: protection, safeguarding, immune system, comment moderation) practical and essential. Do you want your startup's bank account "united and standing together" with some other startup's bank account? Division allows good things to remain good.

None of this is to say all gatekeepers are honest, all standards are fair, or that injustice doesn't exist. Everything is a work in progress. But if the worst you have to complain about is an inconsequential misunderstanding on a group date, count yourself lucky.

To the contrary internationalist left movements have failed to appreciate that nationalistic feeling means something to people and you wind up with own goals like

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treaty_of_Brest-Litovsk

It's not like you have a choice between nationalism and enlightmentment, anomie is a likely outcome too.

>There are groups I'm not part of. This makes me sad. I want to be part of those groups.

Yes, but that inherently dilutes the very conception of a group. This is pretty basic stuff. Groups must be exclusive or they have no meaning.

I understand this will make some people sad and, unfortunately, that's okay.

It makes me sad that I will never be Japanese. What a beautiful country. Man, am I sad. But that's alright, isn't it?

To me, Nationalism and Patriotism mean different things.

At least to me:

Patriotism: the belief in the ideals of your country, in its people and its ability to strive towards that ideal state.

Nationalism: A strong identity tied to ones nation as it exists today (or in the past) at the exclusion of others or other thought

the author sounds like an incel, just replace women with america.