Ask HN: Want to leave my job with nothing lined up
When asking my friends and colleagues what to do, I always get the same answer of either wait until you find something else to quit or wait until they fire you, but whatever you do don’t leave with no offer in hand.
I agree with their approach in general but I’m just really burned out and don’t have the mental energy to come home from a 10 hour day and start preparing for interviews. Ideally I would like time to prepare adequately for interviews and really think about what I want to do next instead of just taking the next thing I’m offered because I’m so desperate to leave my current position.
I’m at a point in my life where I don’t want to sacrifice my mental health just to get the next paycheck, but maybe I’m being foolish and just need to get through it.
Has anyone navigated a situation like this before?
"Ideally I would like time to prepare adequately for interviews and really think about what I want to do next"
The question is prepare for what? Hackerrank is fast going out the window. Every company that wants to raise money needs to be an AI company so they're not going to tell you not to use AI during the interview. You can screenshot questions, paste it into a deprecated AI model, and it'll spit out the exact answer.
Using the AI tools if you haven't might also get you your next job. I think interviews might just be falling back to the classic "build the hardest feature we plan to add", and AI means you get to do in a day what would take a month to do before this.
Take a 2 week vacation first. Make sure it’s 2 weeks (or more, if you can swing it). One is not enough. Actually travel—it doesn’t matter where. Just get out of your normal environment and habits for a little while.
You’re not aiming to solve burnout with the vacation, but only getting some time and space to think and gain a little more perspective.
I bailed on a job in 2022 when I was tired of it and the hiring market was still good. The hiring market turned and it took me a long time to get something new once I was ready. Fortunately, I had a significant cushion.
Prerequisite to taking up any of my suggestions that follow: How long do you think it would take you to get a new job? Triple that estimate. Can you go that long without pay?
If the answer is no, stop reading here.
Regarding prepping / searching while working - have you considered dialing back your hours to give yourself more energy for the search? If they don't like it... well, if you are still comfortable with your financial cushion given my first question, then at least you will have made some progress toward your next thing while still getting paid.
Another way to assess how you feel about staying: Take at least a week and a half off. Several of my job changes have occurred after some time off. It made the suckitude of the current job so obvious that I quit waffling about it and started looking.
I guess a response question to you, OP, how bad is the job if you just start doing less? It's not like you care about promotion chances or long term outcomes, so just do exactly what's assigned and nothing more.
If "yes", then blacklist his number and never answer after hours. When asked to do something different always explain how that affects the other work in progress. Only work 8 hours or whatever you are contracted to do. If your manager kicks up a fuss, then go to the next level and/or HR. Refuse to be demeaned. Of course, you could get fired, but then your manager might get fired for his incompetence. It is a risk. But taking the "I don't give a F**! FAFO" attitude makes you feel more in control.
I speak from experience. I once had a managing director give me a hard time, I blew up on him and waited for what I thought was the inevitable termination. A week later, and most unexpectedly the firm's partners fired the MD.
These kinds of places are often terrible at documenting things and contesting unemployment claims so the odds are in your favor.
Why do you need something lined up? Take a long vacation.
Go enjoy life. Take a year off, two. You’ll be happy you did.
Life is a lot more flexible than people think.
My savings won't take me to social security age but I'm damn tempted to live only another ten years on my own terms rather than work for 20 more and live for 15 more after that in failing health.